Friday, March 18, 2005

Sweet Talk

Kevin ... oh Kevin ... there is NO WAY IN HELL I will ever let you live down that ridiculous photoshoot you did for L'Uomo Vogue. If the first picture is any indication ... well, get ready for a world of ridicule. That said, I have to say that I find no major fault with you when you rarely (very rarely) clean up:

Granted, you are wearing some sort of skully on your head (usually, a definite no-no) but it is covering up your ugly-ass braids (most definitely a no-no) so the one cancels out the other. I wish someone would introduce you to the world of shoelaces but I don't see any chicken grease stains on your white Polo shirt sooo ... Anyways, it's too bad you don't dress like this normally ... no wait ... scratch that ... bring on the trashy Kevin Federlinness ... I mean, what else would there be for me to talk about?

It's not like I'm the only one that's doing the talking ... celebs are more bitchy than I could ever be:

You just know that Nicole and Paris talk shit about each other ... and I loves it!

Egads ... it looks like the Trimspa is no longer working, baby:

Anna Nicole tried to devour Lil' Kim at a recent party. Poor Lil' Kim, she just can't get a break. Her bow tie scheme didn't work because her jury convicted her of perjury and conspiracy (fortunately she was acquitted of obstruction of justice) -- but she could get up to 20 years in prison! Hmmm ... she might have to get used to having larger women have their way with her.

Awww ... Justin Timberlake was overheard whispering sweet nothings to his darling Cameron Diaz:

How precious!

Reese Witherspoon and daughter Ava are the cutest ever:

I love the faces Ava makes ... cute!

Mariah Carey is in Paris doing promotion for her new album:

But don't count on her having any sex while she's over there ... she is happy with her newfound celibacy.

Didn't Shania Twain just have her baby like 2 days ago ... he's already grown into a full-size kid:

And shock of shocks ... her very private husband, Mutt Lange, was actually photographed ... caught on film! I guess he's not a vampire afterall.

Tara Reid looks hot:

Oh wait, I lied.

Gwen Stefani, with her really boring Harajuku Girls, is shooting a new video for Hollaback Girl:

Gwen looks good ... I don't really care for the whole Cholo look but ... you know kids these days.

Kelly Osbourne loves Photoshop:

But she looks great! Shoot, I would need tons of Photoshop for my album cover ... believe me. You go Kelly!

Scott Peterson, having murdered his wife and unborn child, is now dead meat himself:

But that doesn't stop tons of women from hitting on him. Wait, what?!?

And finally, is reporting that this is the teaser poster for the new Wonder Woman movie:

The movie, as you know, is being written and directed by the amazing creator of Buffy the Vampire Slayer Joss Whedon. Any suggestions for who should get the lead role?

Let's do the news:
Last night was ... totally fun! We got kind of a late start but got to drinking as quickly as we could. The 80's music at Luna was really fun ... we all got to hear our requests. I'm still feeling the effects of all that fun we had last night so I'm trying to lay low today ... the last day of school/work before a 2 week vacation ... IEEEEE!!! I can barely contain myself ...

Ugh ... I need to go hide now ... Later!