Britney Spears once wondered what it would be like to use a time machine to gaze into the future but she really doesn't need a time machine to see what the future may hold ... all she has to do is take a good look at the men in her life. This is what her hubby Kevin Federline looks like now and what he will prolly look like in just a few short years:


Yep, I think People magazine is on to something here ... even tho there is no blood relation between Kevin and Britney's daddy Jamie Spears I can see a definite resemblance. The future looks grim, y'all. [Source]

Paris Hilton was in South Beach, Florida last night for a cd release party to celebrate her new album Paris which hits stores next Tuesday. Here is a picture of Team Paris holding court in South Beach:


Pink reader Melissa was also at the Paris party in South Beach and tells me that Paris and co. dedicated a song to Lindsay Lohan -- who they affectionately referred to as Firecrotch -- classy as always. Apparently, Paris did not perform until 2AM after which she promptly left the building. This is the first of many cd release parties to come ... let's hope they get better. [Source]

Xtina Aguilera was also celebrating the release of her own new album last night. Xtina and hubby Jordan Bratman were doing it up at club Marquee in NYC last night to celebrate the release of Back to Basics which hit stores yesterday:


Xtina looks great ... gawd, I think I'm starting to like the stupid red lipstick. Well, maybe not like so much as don't mind anymore. She looks so happy with Jordy ... much congrats to her! [Source]

Heath Ledger and Michelle Williams were not celebrating anything as they holiday in Mexico ... here is a cheery picture of the pair waving hello to all of us:


I was unclear on what Heath's little sign read until I zoomed in on it ... I had no idea he was a huge fan. Hahahahaha ... and yes, as many of you have commented, Michelle does look like she's wearing a bathing suit that she got from Gymboree. [Source]

The baddest mothereffer in Hollywood, Samuel L. Jackson, paid a little visit to MTV's TRL yesterday to promote his new movie Snakes on a Plane which opens (finally) in theaters this Friday:


I have absolutely no doubt that the movie will live up to the immense hype it's been getting on the Interweb. Even if the movie sucks ass, I'm fairly certain it will do very well at the box office. They have been very clear on what the whole movie is about so there should be no complaining after the movie comes out. You see, there are these snakes and they are on this plane. The end. I can't wait to see it! [Source]

Hilary Duff also paid a little visit to TRL yesterday ... she was there to promote her new movie Material Girls (which co-stars her big sister Haylie Duff) which also hits theaters this Friday:


Do we like her dress? Wait, can we call it a dress? I'm not exactly sure what to call it ... but her shoes are nice. [Source]

Additionally, Hilary used her TRL appearance to debut the first single to her new album which gets released in November. Here are a few sreencaps from Hilary's new video Play With Fire:


Hilary explained that the video was shot quickly while she had some free time in Canada ... while the video is pretty simple the song is really freaking catchy. I got to sample the song before the video came out and loved it immediately. The girl knows how to work up a great pop hook. Click HERE to see the video for yourself. [Source]

Avril Lavigne is on the cover of the new issue of Nylon magazine ... here are a few photos from her photospread taken by photographer Jason Nocito:


Yes, I think it finally happened ... I think I'm finally a fan of her new glam look. While I don't feel wrong for liking her sexy red stockings I kinda feel awful liking her argyle patterned tights. Somebody slap me. Miss Lavigne really looks great in these pictures ... who knew I'd ever be on Team Avril? [Source]

Paris Hilton is on the cover of the new issue of Blender magazine ... here are a few photos from her photospread:


Wooo doggies ... that wonk wonk is in full effect. But please don't hate me for saying so ... I kinda like the cover picture ... there's something about the bra + fishnets combo that works. See, even Paris can get it right from time to time. [Source]

Cracked magazine has come out of retirement after being out of print for about two years and is back with a vengence. Of course the only celeb cracked out enough to score the cover of the debut issue is Mr. Tom Cruise himself:


[T]he glossy new version bears little resemblance to the Cracked of old, which relied on hand-drawn cartoons and comic strips. Rather, it resembles the modern breed of "lad mags" like Maxim, Stuff and FHM. It even spoofs the similarity with a gratuitous full-page photo of a scantily clad woman and the caption: "Here is a picture of a skinny blonde model with big breasts." "It's not so much that I modeled the style after Maxim, it's that I modeled the style for today's tastes," says Sarhan, pointing toward the magazine's short-form writing and busy graphical layout. It's targeted at the 18- to 34-year-old male demographic, a bit older than its original audience but about right to attract the now full-grown juvenile delinquents who enjoyed the magazine in its glory days. Sarhan, who is 33, has gathered a stable of contributors that includes writers for "Saturday Night Live" and Comedy Central's "Chappelle's Show," as well as the satirical author Neal Pollack and the actor Michael Ian Black, co-star of the former NBC comedy "Ed" and snarky commentator on VH1's "I Love The..." series. I used to read Cracked and Mad magazine all the time when I was a kid ... I'm intrigued to see what this revamped version of the magazine will look like. I love the K-Fed American Express ad parody ... there can never be too much lampooning of The Federline. [Source]

I'm not sure if many of you are aware but MTV has opened up voting for the Video Music Awards to the public. For the first time, viewers will vote for the award winners at this years VMAs:


Now regular people will be the ones to choose the winners in all the VMA categories. Head on over to the official MTV VMAs website to cast your votes for any and all of the categories. [Source]

I have to send out lots of Birthday Lurve to the Queen of Pop, Our Lady of Music ... the one and only Madonna:


I shant do the disservice of saying how old she turns today but will send her all the PITNB lurve I can muster. Love her or hate her you can't deny that Madonna is truly a legend. From one Michigander to another -- Happy Birthday, Madge! XO

Oh ... and try and stay out of das big haus.

And finally, it's time for a quick little game ... can you guess which Hollywood "It" Girl (who has been getting quite a bit of media attention lately) is the proud owner of these fugly-ass shoes?


I won't be surprised if I get a bunch of comments on how these shoes are the creation of a totally important designer or some shizz like that -- but it must be said that they are, quite possibly, the ugliest shoes ever made. Here's a clue ... for once, the offending mystery celeb is not Mary Kate Olsen. [Source]

Das News:

• The Barkers air their dirty laundry on MySpace. Click HERE to read Travis' original rant on his MS profile.
• The more babies K-Fed makes with Britney, the more money he gets.
• Just how much sex is going on behind the scenes on Project Runway?
• Sorry y'all, Elvis is still dunzo.
• Are Reichen Lemkuhl and Lance Bass shackin' up already?
• Lord have mercy ... Puck from The Real World: San Fran is spawning again.
• The new Miss Teen USA hails from the great state of Montana. Congrats!
• Beth Orton gets knocked up and cancels her tour -- the nerve!
• The ever fabulous BryanBoy sets fashion trends.
• THIS is why I must see Step Up.
• Who knew that Jessica Biel was actually bootylicious?
• When it comes to lovin' on dudes, Lindsay Lohan likes to have options.
• Click HERE to see the new Beyonce video for Ring the Alarm.
• Did Owen Wilson break up Kate Hudson's marriage to Chris Robinson?
• The Sun changes its story.
• "... He can't carry a tune in a bucket" -- Justin Timberlake on American Idol Taylor Hicks
• Diddy got robbed, y'all.P Diddy robbed of £6m necklace
• If I Could Turn Back Time.
• Fergie Ferg talks up her new album.
• Vanessa Carlton is 26, Emily Robison of The Dixie Chicks is 34 and Angela Bassett is 48 years old today. Click HERE to see who else is celebrating a birthday today.
• Mariah Carey thrills Montreal. [thanks Celine]
• Welcome to the Hostel.
• The Madden twins make a cameo in the new movie Material Girls.

Yesterday had to be one of the coolest days I've had in LA so far. My good friend Jim gifted me a day of pampering for my birthday (which was last month) and we finally went out together to have a fun spa afternoon. After I told Jim how much I loved the facial that I got on my last trip to NYC, he got the bright idea to take me out for my first mani and pedi. Yeah, I don't normally do stuff like that but boy, have I been missing out. It was so relaxing and so invigorating ... I loved every second of it. Now, we're gonna try and plan on going back for more on a semi-regular basis.

After our spa treatments, Jim and I met up with Joel and Benji for a quick dinner. The guys and I have been trying to hook up for some hang time ever since I moved to LA and we finally got together yesterday evening. We had a really great time talking about the stuff going on in our lives ... I got to hear about the new album that Good Charlotte are finishing up. Joel revealed to me that the album release has been pushed back to February 2007. The guys are so excited about their new stuff ... they promise it's the best music they've ever made. I'm excited to hear it for myself ... and hopefully, I'll get to preview some of it very soon.

After hanging out with Benji and Joel, Jim and I went out to the Playboy magazine/Stoli vodka party at Social Hollywood to celebrate the release of the September issue featuring the Girls Next Door chicas on the cover. As always, Playboy really knows how to party ... we had an absolute blast:




Hugh Hefner and his ladies looked like they were having a blast. Kendra was bouncing all over the place posing for pictures with everyone ... but Jim and I managed to score a pic with Holly. I got to meet some awesome people including quite a few Pink readers ... I have to say hey to Brian, Claudio, Gina, Nora, Diana, Ani, Jennifer and Rhiannon. Jim was enamoured of the Bunnies that we got photos with. We also ran into Jenna Jameson who was hanging out, once again, with her new muscley friend Ultimate Fighting Champion Tito Ortiz ... who is obviously not Dave Navarro ... Hmm ...

I have to send out much love to Jessica and Gina for taking such good care of us last night! XOXO

It was a late night ... but it was so fun ... not sure what's on tap for ce soir but I know I have some boring errands to run this afternoon. And I guess that is all .. I'm out.

PS: Thank you all for your tips on how to save/take care of my dying orchid ... I'm gonna do my best to try and save the poor thing.

[Permalink]