Shopping with mama Spears just ain't gonna cut it. Upon her return home she hooked up with her newly-shaven rat-faced hubby to get some Starbucks ...
And then head out to Justin Timberlake's club, Chi, in order to celebrate Kevin Federline's 27th birthday!
So in celebration of your birthday ... and your unceasing ability to stay classy and sexy ...
We wish you a happy birthday!
Cityrag had an awesome scoop yesterday when it posted pictures of Paris Hilton's ashtray ... so I present to you -- Paris' Diva Goodies, gotta catch 'em all:
You gotta have the hottest phone, a picture of your beau and some mary-jane. I like that Paris Hilton keeps it real, you know, by rolling her own joints ... see, she's just like regular people. That, my friends, is how you stay HOT!
Also, you have to know when to upgrade ... it seems that Paris has booted Tinkerbell as her #1 accessory in lieu of a newer, younger puppy:
Ain't it just like a younger bitch to break up a happy couple? Poor Tink ... She'll probably become a pair of designer shoes or a handbag or something ... so sad ... Hmm ... I wonder what she named her new little pup.
Here's your Ryan Phillipe update ... homeskillet was out partying a club the other night and Reese Witherspoon, his little (pregnant?) wife, was nowhere to be seen:
Just what the eff is going on here? Those 2 better be seen together, happy and smiling, before people start talking ...
Jake Gyllenhaal is still sportin' a shaved head ...
What is going on here?! Why in hell are Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore hanging out with Idol-quitter Mario Vazquez?!?
Probably because it's actually Wilmer Valderrama ... WTF?! Did Mario quit AI because he and Wilmer Valderrama are actually the same person?
Here's the latest paparazzi picture that makes a celeb look pregnant ... in this case, it's Jennifer Garner:
Actually, she doesn't so much look pregnant as just plain boring/frumpy.
And speaking of boring/frumpy ... Leonardo DiCaprio is really becoming the master of that look:
How is it that he is dating a supermodel? Oh yeah ... his millions of dollars ...
Toby McGuire is really porking out as well:
I think he's going for axe-murderer chic with that full-on beard. I do not approve! Ding Ding!
David Arquette likes pretending he is a big star:
You can tell that he's been hanging out/listening to Ben Affleck way too much.
Kelly Osbourne can go from a right mess to pretty good in no time:
It's not all Photoshop either ... Ah Kelly ... I hate to love ya! [via ONTD!]
And now ............ the news:
- Michael Jackson is such a little whiny beyotch.
- Joss Whedon says he won't do anything "silly" with Wonder Woman; promises to stay true to her spirit. I think I just need to trust him and stop worrying ... but I will keep my eyes and ears open.
- The creator of 24 confirms that Dina Araz was killed on the show this week. Boo!!!
- The White Stripes have finished their 5th album. [thanks Britpoppa]
- Some men just powder their nuts, Billy Idol shaves his.
- Ashton Kutcher is all bitchy that Demi Moore stole his thunder on SNL. What a little beyotch!
- Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson to sell their home.
- The Hand That Feeds by Nine Inch Nails is available on iTunes. Also, a bunch of cool remixes of Kelly Clarkson's Since U Been Gone.
- Outkast's new album/movie to become their own Purple Rain.
- Kriss Kross'll make ya jump ... jump. [via ONTD!]
- The "lo" in J.Lo must stand for low cd sales.
- Peace the Spork Out goes to 30 Odd Foot of Grunts.
- I really don't want to see a picture of Pat O'Brien pleasuring himself. But if it surfaces, I'll post it for all you goss mongers.
- THIS better get a US release!
- WTF?! Is there a ThighMaster imposter in da hizzy?
- John Edwards gets new employment.
We did get to have a great dinner with Steve and Stephanie last night. She is moving to Nashville this Friday and while we are very happy for her, we will miss her and Steve very much. But we're happy about their new situation so there will be no sadness here.
I hate to have to do one of the annoying clichéd blogger sins but I just have to give props to all the cool people who have been visiting lately. Monday was my new highest day ever when I reached the 7 thousand visitors per day plateau ... but that was shattered yesterday when well over 9 thousand people visited:
I knew it all along ... Mischa Barton's boobies were going to make me a star!