Wednesday, May 04, 2005

YEEEEEE-HAW, Y'ALL!

Well I'll be horn-swaggled ... it looks like our favorite little filly has come back home to roost. Britney Spears went out for sushi, y'all ... and she wore her shit-kickers just for the occasion:


Damn ... I'm usually on board with the crazy fashion risks she takes but those boots looked stupid on Mary-Kate Olsen and they don't look a might better on Miss Britney. She is still my girl ... even if she dresses like a fool sometimes. Speaking of fools, here is a promo picture of Kevin Federline and Britney for their upcoming UPN reality show Britney & Kevin: Chaotic:


Except for the mullet ... and well, Kevin himself, it's a very nice picture. We are just 2 weeks away from the show's premiere ... Woot!

OMG ... this is priceless ... so what does Katie Holmes have to show after spending almost a week sucking face with Tom Cruise for all the world to see?


She gets a raging case of herpes! Okay, it's probably not herpes (I said probably not) but it looks like a flaming cold sore ... or some other growth ... it's freakin' gross whatever the hell it is. LOL!

Oh no ... oh no she didn't ... what did Ashlee Simpson do to her hair?!


What the hell ... I am one of Ashlee's biggest defenders but, damn, there ain't no way I can endorse this ridiculous haircut! Not only is the geometrical cut a bad one but the color is HIDEOUS! She looks like a bad backup dancer from an 80's music video! Horrible! Horrendous! I can't think of any other "H" adjectives ... it's so bad.

Orlando Bloom stopped by TRL recently and decided to drop his shorts:


It's nice when celebrities drop by, ain't it?

Hayden Christenson has been doing a lot of promo for Star Wars: Episode III ... I'm not sure if he's not getting any sleep or if he has malaria or something but he looks really bad:


He can look good if he wants to ... he must not have wanted to look good yesterday.

Let's bring it back to the pretty, shall we?


Thanks Jake!

Jennifer Lopez keeps dragging that fugly guy around with her everywhere she goes:


I think she should get a chihuahua to accompany her everywhere she goes ... they're much cuter with the same bulging eyeballs. What more could she want?

Here is another picture of Gwyneth Paltrow with daughter Apple at the pool:


You'll have to trust me, Apple is in the picture too ...

Denise Richards is so ready to have her baby:


She looks like she's gonna give birth to a house ... And I think blue is a much better color for her.

Can someone explain to me how such scary-looking creatures, like Donetella and Allegra Versace, can have anything to do with high fashion?


Donetella ... oy vey ... she is pretty scary but Allegra is just gross! She is a walking skeleton ... she makes Victoria Beckham look like Kirstie Alley. Her dress looks like it's going to break her bones! That girl better eat something or she's going to just disappear or drop dead.

It's not so much that Avril Lavigne likes her booze:


It's more that she hates her liver.

Kate Beckinsale had to get her nails did:


That's it ... there really isn't a joke here.

Nicole Richie, Justin Timberlake and Cameron Diaz were among the celebrities who attended this year's Coachella Festival:


It's too bad none of them were photographed smoking a bong or something like that ... I have to thank Kimberley for sending me this picture from Coachella:


Pink love, y'all ... pink love!

And now, the news:
So Erik and I went to see the movie Eating Out last night:


The dialogue was terrible, the acting was subpar and the sets were completely amateurish ... but, as much as I hate to admit it, we loved it to death! The story is very Three's Company but it's endearing ... in a way. The female characters were hilarious and the sex scene was surprisingly hot ... I can tell you right now, the movie isn't for everyone -- but we really liked it.

I'm leaving work early today to head out to Cleveland to see Ryan Adams play the House of Blues tonight:


You simply must pick up his new album Cold Roses immediately ... it's stunning! The songs are amazing. It's probably his best album yet. I'm really excited for the show. I don't know if I can take pictures but I'm surely going to try. More later.